At a whopping 17 pounds he certainly can’t battle his way out of a tough situation, unless he was being attacked by a Chihuahua, or some other miniature mutt.
So unless his attacker is the size of a rodent, Murph the Surf would not stand much of a chance.
But he is not totally defenseless.
One thing Murphy can do it run like the wind. The dog is not only fast, but he can duck and dodge like no other mutt I have seen.
So when the apocalyptic hoards attack, my dog will lead the retreat by running faster than any creature alive.
But being fleet of foot (or is it paw?) is not his only form of keeping his foes from snatching him.
Murphy has a secret weapon. No it is not a knife or a small handgun he keeps tucked in his collar. This is something much worse: it is a high-pitched bark that can make even the hardcore dog lover consider doggy genocide.
It is the most annoying sound in the world. Yes even more than the incessant chatter of a mother-in-law.
He makes it when he is trying to intimidate another dog.
It is not so much intimidating as it is downright annoying.
Some friends of ours have a lab-retriever cross who is roughly 10,000 times bigger than Murphy. And because the humans are friends, the dogs spend plenty of time together.
Being a little dog with a big attitude, Murphy does not take any crap from Gigantor the Massive Mutt. Or at least he tries not to, but when your opponent is that much heavier than you are it is kind of tough to be the alpha dog.
So Koda, the beast friend of our friends, often knocks little Murphy around whether Murphy wants to or not.
Koda is a beautiful, good-natured dog, but he is not even two years old yet so he still wants to play – all the time. This is usually fine with Murphy who also is also ready to play – all the time.
Murphy’s favourite game is ‘chase me.’ This is where the other dog chases him around and around and around.
Murphy may be small, but he can turn a corner like he is on rails, making him extremely hard to catch. Ducking and dodging is probably the best defense he has. If Koda can’t catch him, Koda can’t knock him around.
The problem is Murphy also likes to sniff things. Nothing is more fascinating to a dog than finding that another dog had recently been through the area.
It’s like they had never heard of other dogs being on the planet and finding evidence of one is the most exciting thing ever.
Murphy will stick his nose mere millimeters away from what I assume is another dog’s pee and sniff like only a dog can.
And this is where things go south for him because when he stops to sniff, Koda pounces and knocks poor little Murphy around like a cork in the ocean.
Murphy will take this once, maybe twice before he becomes annoyed and unleashes his secret weapon.
The other day that weapon hit its mark. Murphy let out such a loud, high-pitched half bark, half squeal that it was Koda everyone felt sorry for.
As Koda pounced, Murphy unleashed his fury right in the ear of his friend, leaving the behemoth to jump around and shake his head for the next five minutes.
Having set the young whippersnapper in his place, Murphy went back to the enjoyment of smelling things.
It was the first time he scored a direct hit on his much larger friend, and it seemed to get the message across. The next time they got together, Koda was much more subdued.
Never underestimate the power of a really annoying sound from a little dog with a big attitude.