Thursday, June 26, 2014

It is a weird world out there

It is a strange world out there and the more news you read, the stranger it gets.
A company in the United States is in hot water for forcing its employees to 'pray' at work and to tell management 'I love you.'
The aunt of the company's founder invented a religion called Onionhead (yup, that is what it's really called) and employees were forced to participate. Those who didn't were demoted and eventually fired.
There is, of course, all sorts of legal action taking place because of the violation of people's freedom of religion.
Several employees were also upset about having to profess their love for management. I have wanted to say a lot of things to management, but 'I love you' was never one of them.
On the other side of the world, North Korean leader Kim Jung-un (which, loosely translated I believe means raging nut job) is upset about inaccurate weather forecasts.
Hey, join the club Chubby.  Who hasn't planned a camping trip, picnic or hike based on a prediction of beautiful weather only to end up feeling like Noah on day 29.
Weather people never get the weather right. It has got to be one of the only jobs in the world where you can be wrong 90 per cent of the time and still get paid. The other jobs are politicians and upper management.
A man in the U.K. credits the Scooby Doo costume he was wearing for saving him from injury after being attacked during a pub crawl to celebrate his friend's birthday (who was dressed as Batman, of course)
A 40-year-old woman attacked the man who said the padding in the suit saved him.
When police arrived, the woman was arrested for the attack, but managed a plea deal where she would be sent to rehab to deal with her serious Scooby-snack addiction.
Back in the United States a man is selling his entire video game collection which consists of a whopping 11,000 titles. He also has numerous game consols, including some that were never released in North America.
The Guiness World Record-setting collection is estimated to be worth around $700,000.
When asked what he will do with the money, he said he hopes to move out of his mom's basement and maybe even kiss a girl some day.
Still in the good old U.S. of A., Florida law enforcement officials arrested the wrong woman – twice.
The lady had the same name as a culprit they were after, but was several years younger and five inches shorter.
Not letting such details deter them, police arrested the single mother and she spent the next four weeks in jail until someone realized they had made a mistake and let her go.
A month later, the woman was in court to clear up the debacle of her first arrest when some enterprising officers noticed her name and arrested her again, once again thinking she was the criminal they were after.
This time, she spent a week in jail before someone figured it out.
She is now one of the most popular women in Florida – with lawyers anyway, who are lining up around the block for the chance to represent her in any possible legal action.
That is if she can stay out of jail long enough to file legal action.
Perhaps Florida police can spend a little more time looking for real criminals, like the 450-pound man with a unique place to stash marijuana.
The man, whose nickname is Fat Boy, was a passenger in a car that police stopped because he was not wearing a seatbelt.
Fat Boy said his gerth would not allow it, but the more police talked to him and the driver, the more suspicious they became so they called in a canine unit to sniff around.
The dog found cocaine in the car and then began sniffing the man's ample belly where police found almost an ounce of pot hidden in one of the fat folds of his gut.
Upon further searching they also found the remains of Jimmy Hoffa and Amelia Earhart's plane.

Copywrite 2014 Darren Handschuh

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